Shipping Edmund Dantes

Do you know what “shipping” is? Apparently it’s when you wish there was a romantic relationship between two fictional characters who don’t have one. I had no idea what it meant until a couple of weeks ago when I saw it on Twitter. Then Tasha from Truth, Beauty, Freedom starting shipping Mina and Dr Seward from Dracula. Shipping is very big in the fan-fiction community. They love two characters so hard they just have to have them together.

People have been doing this for some time. Readers were pissed that Louisa May Alcott didn’t put Laurie and Jo together. Instead he got Amy. Boo. (Sorry if that spoiled anything for you but, come on, it’s old news.) Alcott was having none of it though. Jo and Laurie were not meant to be, get over yourselves, she said.

I’m not going to give too much away but the ending of The Count of Monte Cristo is unsatisfactory to me. I don’t think that it helps that I pretty much hate all the female characters in the novel. Dumas has never written a female character that I gave a bother about. Considering that he went through the ladies like socks tells me maybe he didn’t quite understand my gender. So, I’m going to really stretch my imagination and put Edmund Dantes with someone unexpected: Anne Shirley.

Let’s have a look-see. Anne is an orphan. She’s practically a slave for a family in Nova Scotia. Her only friend is her own reflection. And this is when she’s a kid! It’s rough. Through luck, she finds herself adopted by Matthew and Marilla, siblings who need help around their farm Green Gables on Prince Edward Island. Anne’s good nature and optimism charm the stern Marilla (she had Matthew at Hello) and she wins the hearts of everyone in Avonlea.

Edmund’s life is charmed. He’s about to marry his love and get a promotion, when his jealous rivals arrange his disappearance. He’s thrown in prison, forgotten for years, until he escapes and starts a campaign of revenge as the Count of Monte Cristo. There’s no question that they’ve both had some hard times.

First, Anne would be all, “I want your love but all you love is revenge,” and he’d be all, “REVENGE!!” But then she’d say something like, “I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.” Edmund would say, “Aw, Anne-girl, who needs revenge when we have Octobers? Let’s get you a dress with puffy sleeves.” Then they’d sail off into the sunset and have crazy adventures. Now that’s an ending!

Of course, that leaves Gilbert Blythe all sad and alone in Avonlea. Who can we ship him with? Maybe Marian Halcombe from The Woman in White? What do you think?

13 thoughts on “Shipping Edmund Dantes

  1. I’m all for Edmund settling down with Anne as long as he can have a torrid affair with Emily Thorne from Revenge first. The hotness…oh, the hotness. As for Gilbert, I’ve always shipped him with myself so…

  2. I love your imagined conversation. I know I read Anne of Green Gables when I was young, but remember nothing about it. Count of Monte Cristo is my first Dumas so I don’t have any opinion on his female characters, but based on what you say about him, I doubt they’re ones I will like.

  3. Are you seriously done reading already? I must be the world’s slowest reader.

    Also, I am going to see as I’m reading what I think of the Edmund-Anne hook up idea. Never thought about it. Interesting.

  4. This shipping bizness is news to me. Edmond needs someone, for sure, because the only females I’ve seen so far are Mercedes, and I’m convinced that thing was doomed from the get-go, and the shepardess twit, who is a self-absorbed bitch.

    Hey…maybe he should hook up with Claire from Outlander, which would then leave Jamie free for Heather!

  5. Gilbert Blythe is wonderful and I want one of him for my very own, but I suspect he is sliiiiightly weak of character (if not resolve). Marian, on the other hand, is a Victorian ninja. She would walk all over him.

    On the other hand, I could ship Gilbert and Marianne from Sense and Sensibility. She’s an Anne-ish kind of character and would complement him nicely.

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